Adored! Not Ignored

I was talking with one of my dearest friends the other day and she shared her brilliant new mantra with me. Adored! Not ignored. I love it. She’s looking for a partner as amazing is she is and she is frustrated with men who seem interested, then drop off the face of the earth, only to reappear like it’s no big deal. She knows she deserves to be adored, not ignored, and she won’t accept anything less.

This got me thinking about adoring and ignoring in general. It’s a concept that can be applied to so many different aspects of our lives and relationships. Here are just few simple shifts that came to my mind when I thought about how I could adore more and ignore less. Do you have more ideas? Tell me in the comments below!

Adore yourself first

Love starts from within, so before you can adore other things or other people in your life, you’ve got to adore yourself. It’s so much easier said than done. Life pulls us in a million different directions and taking care of ourselves is often the last item on our to do list – the one we never get to. 

What does adoring yourself more mean to you? Maybe it means getting up half an hour earlier so you can meditate or fit in a workout. Or blocking off your Sunday evening for a hot bath and a good book. Maybe it means putting the laundry off to another night so that you can get an extra hour of sleep. Or it could be turning down a social invitation in favor of your couch and that movie you've been dying to watch. Stop ignoring your needs and desires and, in whatever small way you can, adore yourself more.

Lift your gaze

For all the ease, fun and convenience that the technology and gadgets we have these days bring, at times they can also feel like a ball and chain. The instant gratification of a new message or a refreshed Facebook feed can become a little incessant. So much so that we often go about our lives with our eyes cast downward onto our phones, ignoring the sights and sounds of the world around us, or worse, diverting our gaze and attention away from a friend during an important conversation, or a loved one at the dinner table.

So, in this case, maybe making a resolve to ignore more is the best approach. Ignore the urge to read that text, send that email, or refresh that page until it’s the right time and place. And as a result, with your eyes open and engaged, you’ll witness more miracles – like the buds of spring that are about to blossom, or that amazing moment when you lock eyes with someone you love and you know they can feel just how much they are adored.


Being grateful for all of our blessings is such a simple practice and it’s actually a proven tool for increasing happiness, abundance and joy (I highly recommend reading The Giflts of Imperfection by Brené Brown). And yet, it’s so easy to ignore all of the things that are going well in our lives, and focus our time, energy and attention on what doesn’t seem to be quite perfect, or going exactly as we had planned. I often find myself falling into this nasty trap. So, for all for all of the wonderful things in your life, make an effort, make a commitment to adore them more.

Keeping track of all the things you are grateful for in a daily journal is a wonderful way to start making a gratitude shift. And if you want to dive headfirst into this life-changing practice, my brilliant and soulful friend Millana Snow of SERENE Social is leading a 26-day #getTHANKFUL challenge, which kicks off this Sunday April 13th. If you want to adore more of the good things in your life, join me!

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